Monthly Archives: June 2016

Sometimes life gets in the way

Things have been busy here, and busy is good. Most of the time… however when busy keeps you from posting on your blog… yikes, there is so much to write and so little time. This may come off as a big negative… but I am going to tell you what… swingers need to up their game… I mean seriously… up your fucking game here people. Just because you swing does not make you hot and wanted. Sheesh…

I have a couple handfuls of posts that are in various stages of completion. Maybe I will get those done soon… but here are some things I am really bothered with recently.

Cockblocking 1 – the fastest way for a swinger to cockblock themselves is to tell a prospective playmate that ‘I get all the sex I want or need at home’.

Good for you. Glad it is all wonderful and perfect. Why the hell are you wasting my time?

I never understand why you seek someone out and then tell them you really aren’t into swinging for the sex.

I am. I enjoy the sex and I enjoy sex with folks not my spouse. So, please stop wasting my time. If you are not interested in having sex with others and with me in particular… leave me alone. I cannot imagine sex would be that wonderful with you since you find it so unnecessary in your life to have swinger sex and still seek swingers out to meet.

Cockblocking 2 – When you want to meet up with someone and fuck them… figure out how to best communicate with them. Two texts of hi how are you and then going straight into sexting and having no idea of what the person likes to sext about… leaves you with some real communication problems… here is an example….

6:40 am – good morning (WTF??? who texts someone not a significant other at 6 fucking 40 in the morning)…

9 ish during a workday….

text 1 glad to get to know you

text 2 do you want to suck my cock?

text 3 why haven’t you responded 😦

text 4 😦

text 5 can I call you – no response from the person you want to call so you call them anyways.

text 6 – 16 cock shots… 9 or 10 of them in a row… less than 30 seconds between… during the work day…

So an email is sent explaining pretty much as game plan complete with tips and tricks to get my attention… long ass email…

his response – ur hot and I want to fuk u.

Sometimes there is nothing a person can do to un-cock-block someone who is repeatedly being dense.

It is hard to figure out if you can talk with a person when face-to-face if the person is unable to grasp… 6:40 is not a time to text someone… or 9 cock shots in less than 3 minutes is excessive… or sending a picture of a can of beer to someone who hates beer is stupid… and that last one as well as all the rest… if you would have just tried to get to know the person (me) first… this could have been avoided…

 

I will be honest here and say that I am so tired of ‘dating’ swingers when it is so much work as opposed to going to a party or club and meeting folks.

Here are a few things you can do to up your game some…

Have pictures – make sure those pictures look good… don’t post them if they aren’t your best… I am not going to want to meet someone who I cannot tell if they are hot or not… I will default to not…

Have something of value to say to the person you want to meet. I truly do not care if you love each other so much and the sex is constant and constantly perfect… because I can only ask who are you lying to???? I want to know why you want to meet me… I want to know what makes you  want me… I want to want you… telling me you don’t need extra sex isn’t going to get me to want you…

Try to figure out that balance between showing desire/want and being needy. Sending me or anyone unhappy emojis because I have taken more than 5 minutes to respond to you is needy. It is a turn off. Grow up and realize that a swinger has more things happening in their lives than just sitting and waiting around for your text or email.

Seriously, do not ask them if after two texts (hi sweetie and I want to lick your pussy) are you wet – are you ready for your husband to take care of you? Really, you think when you text me randomly and send one ‘sexy’ text I am ready to attack my spouse? That is the most incredibly absurd thing I have every heard… get your ego in check and do a bit of work…

Do not think I want to hear all about you having sex with your spouse or other playmates. This is not a jealousy issue. It is simply a ‘who gives a shit’ issue. I have sex with other people too… I do not need to know you had sex with your wife as a way to turn me on…. I want to know what you want to do with me… I could care less about all your contact with others… I want to have desire built between you and me… that can’t happen if I suddenly become DEAR ABBY for you in swingerville.

Now, that does not mean I don’t want to hear about your adventures… or your trials as we all have them… but if you want in my panties… you have to work at it a bit harder…

I have written on wooing, want, need, and desire… and I am not seeing many swingers doing this…

There are three main areas in which a swinger who approaches another swinger falls…

Hot and heavy interest and great sex

Friends

Nowhere

You have to work hard as a swinger to get to the hot and heavy interest and great sex… just because you swing does not mean anyone wants you…

Being a swinger doesn’t guarantee you swinger sex… you have to work at attracting the attention and interest of another swinger and by all that is good in this world, focus on your prospective partner and stop with the expectation that chemistry is instant just because you swing.

Hope you are enjoying your sexually social adventure…

Sophia