Tag Archives: curious

Open Minded, Curious, and Scared….

Umm, today’s topic is about bisexuality… not women’s… because if popular opinion is believed, all women in the lifestyle are bisexual.

WHOA NOW… if you are a straight woman in the lifestyle and are thinking WTH is she talking about…. don’t worry… I don’t believe that popular opinion. I actually know it is a line that most say to have more play opportunities… I mean seriously… if they list as bi-ANYTHING they have more play chances…

And yet on the other side of the coin…. bi – ANYTHING for a guy is a death sentence to a couple looking for a little play time… even if the bi-play for guys is not on the table… as if by being a bi-anything guy you will aggressively attack the other guy…

You know what I mean… the bi-anything guy will take the SO STRAIGHT IT HURTS guy’s cock from his pants and begin sucking on it…

Now, I am not a cock owner… so I don’t know if what I am about to say is true…. but if you are truly turned off by another man sucking your cock… wouldn’t you have difficulty getting it up?

An even bigger question to ask… if a guy was going towards your cock… wouldn’t you be able to…. I don’t know… move out of the way and keep your cock away from the bi-anything guy?

Or even better… say when you are looking at their profile and you find HER hot and you are not into bi anything… because you are so straight it hurts…. couldn’t you say… “hey, I wanna play with your wife… my wife wants to play with you… they may play some together… but umm… we won’t be playing none of that guy/guy stuff…. ”

So…. why does putting down that you are open minded, bi-curious, bi-sexual or whatever terms others use…. a death sentence for guys and an open invitation for women?

I mean nothing bad or insinuating bi-anything men would simply grab another man’s cock that is listed as straight or has not had any communication about the possibility of bi play with the other guy…

I know that most guys in the lifestyle that do openly admit to their bi-anything status know how precious it is to get a couple who are not afraid of him being bi-anything… they are not going to risk a reputation or a fist in their face for making a ‘bad’ decision like that….

However, that is one of the biggest fears… that the bi-anything guy is going to make a move on them….

And I wonder if the real fear goes deeper to… what if they like it?

What if a guy who has always identified as straight… and always felt straight… suddenly found himself intrigued by the thought of sucking another man’s cock covered in his wife’s juices…

Now, one can rationalize that he is just open to a new adventures that involve his wife… that the focus is on his wife’s pleasure…. not sucking a cock….

Well, with most rationalizations…. it’s pretty obvious that you are rationalizing to make the object you desire at that moment not about what it is about… but what you find acceptable….

You could just say, you want to suck a man’s cock that has been covered in your wife’s juices because it sounds fun to you….

There is nothing wrong with that… and certainly is a turn on for – if all three or four depending on the group dynamics are up for it…

It is one of those things that requires communication just as it does if you are a woman wanting to go down on another woman… you ask… simple as that…

If they say yes… happy diving… if they say no… another person will likely help you out in this…. possibly at another time in the future….

But is there anything wrong with admitting to your spouse on your sexually social adventure that you want to suck a man’s cock that is covered in her juices?

In some marriages, yes. But even if the wife does not want to see that… can you fulfill that fantasy in another way? Yes, you can. Maybe it is ¬†with a hall pass… Or at a party where you and your wife play separately… or maybe your wife agrees after you talk about it… and she says… one time we will try it and see if I can watch that happen…

It is all about communication.

You first have to be willing to ask yourself the tough questions and be honest enough to answer.

Have you always wondered or just started to wonder what it would be like to suck a cock?

Do you enjoy pegging by your wife and at a moment of high enjoyment wonder what it would be like to have a man take your ass?

Or have you wanted to take a man’s ass?

Is there really anything wrong with wondering these things? Asking yourself these questions to see if the answers turn you on or turn you off?

What is wrong with admitting that there are some cocks that you find attractive?

What is wrong with thinking that this is my wife’s fantasy and I want to make sure I can be a part of fulfilling her fantasies?

Or, you know what… this is a sexually social adventure… why not try it at least once… if I like it great… if I don’t… at least I know…

I like to think – and naively I am sure… that the lifestyle should be open to everyone enjoying their sexual kinks how they want… but that doesn’t always happen…

As a lifestyle we (not me, but we collectively) pressure women into being bi-something to get things started and men to stay as far away from bi-anything to ensure they aren’t blacklisted… I wish so much that women who aren’t bi would list themselves as straight and be done with the pretending and the same with the straight listed guys who are bi or curious about bi.

Interestingly enough… in some cases… listing bi-anything males will get all kinds of folks knocking at your ‘profile’ door… and other times listing bi-anything will only draw crickets…. (silence). It makes no sense and it is often the thing that makes you shake your head in wonder…

Personally, I find nothing wrong with a man who is interested in exploring his bi side. Why should a man be penalized for exploring what so many force women to explore? I think a man who is able to explore those things that turn him on is sexy. They are willing to say to everyone… they are not ashamed to be who they are… explore what they want… and you know what a word lover I am… communicate what they like to those they meet… or want to meet.

The openness it takes to share that desire to explore their male bi side is a huge turn on for me. I know the courage it takes. And a courageous man is a sexy man. I know how hard it is to share those feelings and desires… a man who is open and in this particular case – vulnerable in their openness – is sexy to me. To tell me that they would love to be free from the confines the lifestyle places on them… yeah, it breaks my heart… but I think little by little we have an opportunity to let others know it is okay to share that and explore that side of them….

Am I being a naive polly-anna saying that they should take the most public route to announcing their bi-anything-ness…. Nope. I am saying that as we develop a group of core playmates, friends, and lovers we should be able to weed out those who are homophobic from the groups and welcome those who want to explore their bi-ness…

In case you are wondering… I am not saying that every man in the group must be bi-something… but to welcome those who want to explore openly their desires and fantasies without being ostracized for even thinking they would want to explore that side of them. It doesn’t mean that they are ‘at risk’ for being hit on by a guy while playing, but they know that they can if they choose explore that side without ridicule.

I know that to even promote a group however or wherever as guy bi friendly will get you kicked out of contention, but is that necessary to do? No, it isn’t. Sometimes it is enough to promote a group that welcomes everyone without judgment… without ridicule…. without back stabbing…

It will take a weeding out process. One that never stops. One that needs someone strong enough to take the backlash. Someone who will be the voice for the group to promote healthy sexual exploration…

Well, I would love to be that person… to truly encourage others to explore their kinks… their bi side, their straight side… their whatever their adventure is and where it takes them…

I don’t see a problem with a man wanting to explore another man. To suck and be sucked by a man… to fuck and be fucked by a man…

In fact… the very thought of it turns me on… my favorite porn and seriously the only porn I watch anymore is guy/guy porn…

There is something very sexy and masculine about a man who knows what he wants and goes after it… even if it is another man.

Hope you are enjoying your sexually social adventure… no matter how you play….

Sophia